13 Dec 2019

  • Spanish (Mexico)
  • English (US)
Question about English (US)

Hi guys, can you please help me correct this text? Thank you

1. Essentials.

Dear Sir,

I am writing to you in regard to the article published on the second of May regarding the counterproductive effects that mobile phones HAVE on children.
As far as I am concerned, never before have we seen such an increase in children's interest for these kinds of devices. Not only do they use them on a daily basis, but they seem to be devoid of interest in other kind of passtimes such as sports, outdoor activities, or hanging out with their friends. What is more, on many occasions such tendency has a detrimental effect in the performance of children's studies, inasmuch as they can be disconcentred in classes since they are paying more attention to their phones while they are in classes.
Having said that, I am of the opinion that some measures should be taken into consideration with the aim to guaranteeing the proper psychological development of children. First and foremost, the use of technological devices should be limited. Were a child to spend less time with his phone, it is highly likely that he would be more entinced in taking up new hobbies. Secondly, under no circumstances should phones be allowed in the classroom, since it is common knowledge that they represent a distractION and can put children's learningship IN JEOPARDY. Last but certainly not least, it is imperative that from an early age children acknowledge the advantages and drawbacks of the use of technology. The more knowledgeable they are in this respect, the wise their decisions about how they spend their spare time will be.
I do hope that my suggestions are given the consideration they deserve and are published.
Yours faithfully,

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  • English (US)
  • Simplified Chinese (China) Near fluent
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