20 Nov 01:59 AM

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What does Everyone is just out to get me


BOJACK: Yeah, there were exactly 12! I ate 12 muffins, and I didn't even want one! There's your goddamn news story, the myster of my missing goddamn self-respect! (Pants)

Cut to a side view of the living room. BOJACK picks up the remote and turns off the TV.

BOJACK: (Panting) How'd I come off?

DIANE scratches her head.

TODD: Well, that went slightly better than the worst it could have possibly gone, so...hooray?

Cut to a closeup of a horse-shaped inner tube floating in BOJACK's swimming pool. An open beer bottle is resting in one of the cup holders.


BOJACK is pouring himself another drink. DIANE is sitting across the room on a couch.

BOJACK: It's not even about the muffins. Everyone is just out to get me because I'm famous and so well-adjusted.
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