Question
26 Oct 2017
- Italian
-
English (UK)
Question about English (UK)
Can you tell me if there are any errors in the following letter?
Can you tell me if there are any errors in the following letter?
Dear Sir or Madam,
My friends and I are renting one of your properties. The apartment is located in Venice, Sestiere Cannaregio, and we moved there two weeks ago. I am writing to inform you of some issues that we are having.
While we enjoy the position very much, we couldn't but notice that the house is in need of some serious maintenance. In particular, the bathroom is in terrible conditions, due to dampness and mold that cover the walls. Also, the external stairway that leads to the apartment looks quite old and we fear that it could be dangerous.
We would be grateful if you could contact the owner and take a look at these problems as soon as possible.
In addition to that, since there is a spare bedroom and the rent is pretty high, we would like to know if it’s possible to let another student move in and share the apartment.
I look forward to hearing from you very soon.
Yours faithfully.
My friends and I are renting one of your properties. The apartment is located in Venice, Sestiere Cannaregio, and we moved there two weeks ago. I am writing to inform you of some issues that we are having.
While we enjoy the position very much, we couldn't but notice that the house is in need of some serious maintenance. In particular, the bathroom is in terrible conditions, due to dampness and mold that cover the walls. Also, the external stairway that leads to the apartment looks quite old and we fear that it could be dangerous.
We would be grateful if you could contact the owner and take a look at these problems as soon as possible.
In addition to that, since there is a spare bedroom and the rent is pretty high, we would like to know if it’s possible to let another student move in and share the apartment.
I look forward to hearing from you very soon.
Yours faithfully.
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- English (UK)
"Dear Sir or Madam,
My friends and I have recently started renting an apartment of yours in Venice, Sestiere Cannaregio, about two weeks ago. I writing to inform you that we are having some issues with the apartment.
We really appreciate you renting it to us, we can't help but notice that it is in need of some serious renovations. Especially the bathroom as it is covered in mild due to the damp. The external stairway that leads to the apartment appears to be rather old and we fear that it might be too dangerous to use. We would be grateful if you could take a look at it and would appreciate it if the problems could be solved as soon as possible.
In addition, there is a spare room and we were wondering if it is possible for you to allow another student to stay here in order to help us pay the rent.
We are really grateful to the apartment you have given us and will look forward to hearing back from you soon.
Yours faithfully,
(Full name)"
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- Italian
@jacabob Thank you very much for your help, I really appreciate that. Could you tell me if there were any mistakes in my text, or if some points just didn't sound natural?
- English (UK)
It was fine although some phrases weren't natural but I corrected them for you. 😊 if it is a formal letter then it would be better for you to be a little bit less direct as it may come across as rude.
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- Italian
- English (UK)
- instead of position use location
- we couldn't HELP but notice
- is in terrible condition
- and mould that covers the walls
- this is a very small detail but i would say : Sestiere Cannaregio, Venice instead of the other way round.
hope this helps :)
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